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Thanksgiving Fullervision Style 2006

"Mashed potatoes, gravy, and cranberry sauce! Whoooo!!!" -- Little Richard
View the entire Thanksgiving comic portfolio...
There are exactly days until Thanksgiving.

Thursday, November 23, 2006

The Story of Thanksgiving

The story begins in England. A religious group known today as the Pilgrims were disillusioned with the Church of England and wanted to separate. Efforts to do this in England were futile due to the Crown's fierce resistance, so they moved at first to Holland until they were able to raise enough funds for a ship to the New World of America, which had been successfully settled since 1607. According to records, the group planned to experiment with a communist society where all the raised goods would be placed into a common store. In 1620, they landed and attempted to implement this economic system. Food shortages abounded, winter was long, and many died. The system was scrapped in the spring of 1621 and instead replaced it with open markets and an "every man for himself" system. With a market system in place, and a little bit of help from some gracious natives, the food supply grew to much higher levels and thus a feast was declared after harvest. The Pilgrim community was a devout one and thus gratitude to God was paid on this day of thanksgiving.

Thanksgiving Foods

Of course, the most common food that is ever eaten during the Thanksgiving holiday is roast turkey. Generally, how one roasts a turkey is by thawing it (using the "cold water" method, this takes about 30 minutes per pound, so obviously an overnight job), removing the neck and giblets, adding some crouton-based stuffing, and cooking the turkey at 325°F for 15 minutes per pound until the meat is at 180°F. Further details can be found from this Web site. In a crisis, call the Butterball Hotline at 1-800-BUTTERBALL (that is, 1-800-288-8372).
Other traditional Thanksgiving foods include:
  • Green bean casserole (recipe)
    A recipe using green beans, cream of mushroom soup, and fried onions. Nothing says "happy holidays" more, other than perhaps the turkey itself.
  • Cranberry sauce
    Available in the can in whole berry or jelly varieties.
  • Vegetables
    • Yams (recipe)
      Gotta have yams. Prepare them with brown sugar and vanilla for a Thanksgiving classic. (OK, technically they're called "sweet potatoes," but 1] they're not potatoes and 2] yam is more fun to say.)
    • Squash
      Acorn squash and butternut squash are the two most common varieties. Split the squash in half, sprinkle some brown sugar and honey or syrup in the cavities, and bake at 400°F for roughly an hour.
    • Mashed potatoes
      Well, you have to do something with the turkey gravy.
  • Pumpkin pie
  • Pumpkin puree is mixed with sugar and milk and baked in a pie crust. Other pies are popular as well.
  • Other traditional family favorites

Media Guide (All times ET)

Monday, November 20, 2006
8:00-8:30 PM ABC: A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving
The third of many Peanuts specials, this one focuses on an imposing Peppermint Patty forcing Charlie Brown to host Thanksgiving... and the resulting main course of toast and side dish of popcorn. The program will be followed by He's a Bully, Charlie Brown and regular schedule to follow.
PLEASE NOTE THAT THIS PROGRAM HAS MOVED FROM PREVIOUS YEARS' AIRINGS. The program used to air on Thanksgiving night but because ABC is now in a ratings war on Thursdays with CBS, who has aired a regular schedule on Thanksgiving for several years now, the program was moved.

Tuesday, November 21, 2006
8:00-9:00 PM NBC: Tony Bennett: An American Classic
A celebration of the legendary Italian crooner's 80th birthday.

Wednesday, November 22, 2006
12:05-3:00 PM EIB Network (Radio): The Rush Limbaugh Show-- The True Story of Thanksgiving
The story of the Pilgrims as told by America's #1 talk show host. Segment usually airs during the third hour.
Radio Stations: WBEN 930 Buffalo, WOEN 1360 Olean, WKSN 1340 Jamestown, WTNY 790 Watertown, WWLZ 820 Horseheads/Elmira, WNBF 1290 Binghamton, WLEA 1480 Hornell, WYBG 1050 Massena, WSLB 1400 Ogdensburg, WGY 810 Albany, WJET 1400 Erie PA, WSYR 570 Syracuse, WHAM 1180 Rochester (2-5)
Internet broadcasts (all will be available on WFV Internet Radio):WABC New York City, NY , WBAP Dallas, TX (1-4), WHAM (2-5), KGAB Cheyenne, WY (9p-12m & 3-6a Thursday), KMBZ Kansas City, MO (1-5a Thursday)

8:00-10:00 PM NBC: Madonna-- The Confessions Tour Live from London
Shock mistress and Kaballah shill Madonna (didn't she change her name to Esther?) performs cuts from her 2005 album "Confessions on a Dance Floor." A point where she hangs herself on a mock crucifix had to be edited out of the show.
8:00-10:00 PM Fox: Movie: Cheaper by the Dozen (2002)

Thursday, November 23, 2006
9:00 AM-12:00 N NBC: Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade
9:00 AM-12:00 N CBS: Parade coverage from across the USA

Dueling networks once again take aim at parade coverage, with CBS sampling parades across the nation and NBC's Today Show crew focusing on the granddaddy of them all, the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade, which celebrates its 80th anniversary this year.
View NBC's press release on the Macy's Parade, including notable acts, balloons and floats.
12:00 N-2:00 PM NBC: The National Dog Show as presented by Purina
Who will go home top dog... er, Best in Show?
12:30-4:00 PM CBS/WW1: NFL Football-- Detroit Lions Thanksgiving Classic
The Lions host the Miami Dolphins in their only nationally televised game of the year.
Internet broadcast will be available on FSB.
2:00-4:00 PM NBC: Movie: Babe
The story of an outcast orphan pig, raised by various barnyard animals, who has a knack for shepherding. Not much else is there to be said about it. Replaces "Miracle on 34th Street," which had aired in this time slot for several years.
4:15-7:30 PM FOX/WW1: NFL Football-- Dallas Cowboys Thanksgiving Classic
The Cowboys will host the Tampa Bay Buccaneers.
Internet broadcast will be available on FSB.and a movie to be announced.
8:00-10:00 PM FOX: Movie: Spider-Man 2
The blockbuster sequel to the blockbuster film starring Tobey Maguire and Kirsten Dunst. (Fox showed the first Spider-Man movie on Thanksgiving 2004.)
7:30-10:30 PM ESPN: NCAA College Football
Boston College @ Miami.
8:00-11:00 PM NFL Network/WW1: NFL Football-- Kansas City Chiefs Thanksgiving Classic
The NFL Network debuts its coverage of NFL games with the first ever Thanksgiving night game; the Kansas City Chiefs will host the Denver Broncos. Kansas City returns to Thanksgiving after it had been the AFL's choice for the Thanksgiving game. (Ironically, they gave that up to the Cowboys, the very team that forced them out of Dallas and into KC.)
Internet broadcast will be available on FSB.
NBC will be showing a two-hour episode of "Deal or No Deal."
CBS will be airing a regular schedule of Survivor, CSI and Shark as they have the past few years.
ABC will be airing a regular schedule of Ugly Betty, Grey's Anatomy and Primetime for the first time in a few years as a result of a ratings war with CBS.

Friday, November 24, 2006
ABC and CBS: NCAA College Football
CBS: SEC on CBS; LSU @ Arkansas (2:30 PM ET)
ABC: Texas A&M @ Texas (12:00 N ET) and Colorado @ Nebraska (3:30 PM ET)
NBC and Fox: Movies
NBC airs "The Family Man" and Fox airs "Bruce Almighty." (both start at 8:00 PM)
Various music radio outlets around the country: Christmas Music Begins
Please see Holiday Music Watch for further details on when and which stations have switched over.

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